This House Is CLEAN

Hopefully you heard the voice of the little, creepy lady from Poltergeist as you read the title of this post... that was my intent :)

I'M HEALED!! Almost... but compared to the near-death state I felt like I was in a few short days ago, this is HEAVEN.

UPDATES:
  I'm the worst bride EVER.  It has officially been 1 year since Brian proposed.. and we are nearing the 6 month point since our wedding.. and I STILL HAVEN'T SENT OUR WEDDING ANNOUNCEMENT IN to local papers.  YIKES!  However.. I've been paying close attention and realize I'm not the only Bad Bride.. and there are still weddings being shared that happened before ours.  PHEW!  So the final hurdle.. which picture to use with the announcement?  I've sent my 6 finalist photos to my girlfriends... and a few man-friends... to help me decide.  The winning photo (and the runners up... you know, in case the winner cannot fulfill it's wedding photo duties...) will be posted here soon :)

  More evidence of my post-wedding shame.. I haven't picked up my dress from the cleaners!  EEK!  It was done being cleaned and preserved last week and I haven't gotten my always-late butt to 50th and Leavenworth to pick it up.  I should be getting ready for work so I can stop and get it as I head in... but I'm blogging about my procrastination instead.  Go figure :)

  Finally... not only am I a bad bride--I'm a horrible momma!!  As you read in the last post (the death-bed sickness post).. Bri took Mack to PetSmart when I was sick.  I was grumpy and mean, Bri is working 16 hour days, and we had tile installed in our entryway for the last few days.  While Mack was at Doggie Camp--there was apparently a gang fight in the play room... the keepers said that two other dogs started fighting, Mack jumped in, and MACK was the only one who got bit.  Here's how I think it went down... (thinking in "Up" movie terms will help)

ALPHA LAB: "Hey... Beta.. you see that dog over there?  He's been eying my pork chop.  I don't like it."

BETA ROTTWEILER: "yeah... YEAH!  That dog's a jerk!  Get him, Alpha!"

ALPHA LAB:  "Hey... Boxer!  Yeah, I'm talking to you.. You like that pork chop, do ya?  Yeah... I didn't think so... well just to make sure, I better teach ya a lesson..."

BOXER:  "What?? No!! I would never think of squeaking your pork chop, Alpha!! Never!  EEK!!"

MACK:  "Hey--HEY! Can't we all just get a long!!!??!!"

(sigh) So Mack was apparently holding the Boxer down.. and the Lab went at him and ripped through a bit of his ear. He's fine.. but had to get a few stitches and spent the last two days of Doggie Camp in the Doggie Hospital.  Poor guy :(   At least he doesn't have to wear the CONE OF SHAME!!!! Let's just say it's belly rub time.. whenever he says it is... for the next few months.  I feel SO GUILTY :(

UGH

There's no better title for this post.  I can get creative, I can mince words, but I'm sick. And gross.  And crabby.  And horrible to my husband and dog because of all I just mentioned.

I knew my voice was going Wednesday.  I've lost my voice twice a year ever since I was 14 or 15 years old... I don't know why, though I'm guessing seasonal allergies are to blame.  That being said... pretty sure there are NO allergies floating around in the ice world of HOTH.. so who the hell knows.

Anyway... I was all out mannish on Thursday... and by Thursday afternoon my body just felt WEAK.. I ended up going home sick after the 6pm newscast.  Felt sluggish yesterday.. but went ahead and emceed an event I had already been committed to.  Came home, went to bed.

WOKE UP AT 5 AM, MISERABLE.  My throat, raw.  My head, pounding.  My patience, gone.  I can't sleep, can't stop coughing barking, and by the time Bri woke up at 9 I snapped at him because Mack was whining to be let out and I didn't get off the couch to do it.  He let Mack out--I went back to bed.

I woke up at 1 this afternoon.. and Bri had gone to work.. and taken Mack to PetSmart so I could just sleep and get better.  Have I mentioned he's the best husband on earth??

Ugh.. I feel horrible... icky, gross, pathetic.. I've watched everything on my DVR.. movies on HBO I had even vague interest in.. and I've sunk to watching the US Pairs Ice Skating PRELIMS.. not even the finals... while eating straight up Julienne potatoes.. because that was the only thing in our pantry that looked remotely appetizing other than the Peanut Butter Captain Crunch I've been living on for the past 36 hours.

Oh yeah--did I mention Bri was at home sick with the FLU all week this week, and not once did he snap at me or whine about ANYTHING, let alone our poor dog? YEAH, I suck.

Here's to HEALTH.. SLEEP... and whatever else it takes to feel even incrimentally better than this.  Because.. well.. UGH.